Shopping in reverse is so so smart. It’s like tackling finances - being in control and making good financial decisions is the heart of a truly smart working wardrobe. Loved our conversation, as ever! ♥️
the only time they work is in that one part of the conference hall that isn’t freezing cold or so hot you’re sweating….for those 5 minutes you will look so chic
As a sweaty person, I've actually found the perfect use for them—Zoom meetings. The higher neck looks good on camera, but my arm pits are free so I don't get too hot. I have four from Gap in different bright colors that I wear and they're my trademark outfit now. I wear them with leisure bottoms, usually (see: sweaty). But yes, rarely wear them out of the house!
Ok not to brag but I have figured this out! Either like a Dickey underneath another sweater/shirt OR worn with a cardigan, shirt jacket, or a light jacket that you plan to keep on. I like having in my office wardrobe for transitional seasons bc I never know if I’ll be freezing or roasting each day.
And I absolutely did that last week (shopped for fall to gain some control) but I can feel good that half the items I bought were staples on sale and summer pieces, so perhaps I did both?! I also got pieces that last fall I wished id had. Now I just have to do a purge to make room. 😬
Hilariously I DO own a sleeveless turtleneck cashmere sweater which was a bargain from Bicester Village outlet store about 25 years ago which does indeed have its moment about once a year (actually, about once every three, but it's N Peal and it's not leaving).
I have been shopping in reverse and it's fantastic. Last year all my stars aligned so thanks to a financial windfall and shifting some temporary weight, as well as some permanent weight, yay!, and tailoring coming back into fashion, AND turning 50, I have been seriously overhauling my wardrobe and thinking really hard about the gaps, what truly suits me, what I really NEED.
For the first time in years I haven't had to panic-buy something I dislike because I didn't have time or money to find anything better. I've been watching style advice and making copious notes every time I try an outfit on and don't like it. I've worked out the big-ticket items where I'm prepared to spend a lot, but it has to tick all the boxes. For example, I really want my perfect Max Mara camel coat, but for the last couple of seasons they've all been unlined. Seriously? That much money and it's going to stick to my clothes like effing Velcro? Or I can take it to a tailor and spend even more getting it lined? I'll wait. As my grandmother used to say, if I die, I die.
I get so much satisfaction from spotting something online or in a shop, checking my list - yep, deep v neck jumper, black, cream or mid grey, merino, long in torso (thanks, Uniqlo) - trying it on and knowing I will wear it, and remembering the pieces I already own which have been waiting for it to turn up. Equally satisfying is going yes, it's good, but it's too sheer ... where's the perfect underpinning for this? Nope ... nope ..no..ugh no ...yesssss, gotcha! I'm not over consuming and I'm not buying things I pull out for the second time and think, God, I never want to wear you again, and I'm not just buying dull basics, but everything needs to earn its place in my wardrobe.
I realise that this is exactly what my mother did when I was small, for both her and me; the oft repeated mantra 'what will it go with, where will you wear it, when will you wear it, will it still fit in a year, will it wear out?' and the taking of notes for the sales. Satisfyingly circular!
I live in the Central Valley of California and it’s early November before I can reliably count on weather that feels like fall. I like to go thrifting in January after everyone has donated their old sweaters to make room for the ones they got for Christmas.
no joke, i just this year realized that January is the thrifting jackpot, so much good stuff. And I hate winter so now I have a new thing to look forward to!
I love this. I am riding high on post convention FREEDOM vibes, and I love the idea of refusal as freedom. Including refusal to participate in fashion’s dictated seasons if I don’t want to!
I’m pregnant which has forced me to totally pause on shopping. I usually shop in reverse but who knows what my body will look like 10 months from now? I’m really appreciating the forced pause - I’ve spent so much less money when I already thought I’d cut back on buying clothes.
I touched on this today too! Ever since I became a mom, I’ve put a prime value on staying present and in the moment. There’s something inspiring about kids and their ability to ground you like that. That - and the fact that our late summer here in SoCal doesn’t even happen til Halloween 🤣🫠
"Shopping for the future is tempting because it feels like you’re investing in a version of life you can control. You imagine those perfect fall moments—cozy in a new sweater, strolling through leaves in fresh boots—and you shop for that vision. It’s like shaping a future that feels more certain. But the reality doesn’t always match the picture you had in mind when you bought that outfit. You’re buying for a fantasy, not the life that actually unfolds."
OOF. This really hit me because lately whenever I see something I “like” I need to ask myself if I’m practically going to be able to fit it into my existing life and lifestyle. Many times the answer is no, and that’s how I am shielding myself from marketing and influence. It’s really hard but reality is starting to lead me vs the idea of my future self. This comes from the hard work of self-awareness and knowing what is realistically feasible for you.
Self-help folks will tell you to start living the life that you want, and then eventually it will become your life, but I don’t think that that’s realistic for most people. Essentially they are simply marketers for their own brands. We fall for this marketing, similarly how we fall for "Fall fashion" marketing. Our lives are complicated and disruptive and messy and, a lot of times, out of our control—like am I really going to be a sleeveless turtleneck girl in a few months? Or ever? Or do I just WISH I was or could be sleeveless turtleneck girl? Marketing has us as ourselves these questions all the time. But you have to take a good, hard look at your closet and what still has the tags on, factory folds still visible, soles unworn, toe boxes unscuffed... and see who you actually are.
you make such a good point about the self help dynamic..i havent really thought of it like that. and yes i learned the turtleneck lesson many times..the hard way haha. even with hobbies, like surfing! so badly wanted to be the girl who surfs...sucked and it and hated it.
At the same time, there is nothing better than the freedom of letting go of the fantasy to be a surfer or having long nails. Appreciate other surfers and other people's long nails. It's so liberating to give up on a dream that isn't working for you.
oof, "But you have to take a good, hard look at your closet and what still has the tags on, factory folds still visible, soles unworn, toe boxes unscuffed... and see who you actually are."... this hit.
I’ve started leaving notes for next year in my google calendar at the end of the season as reminders for what I actually felt was missing from my wardrobe (simple but interesting enough throw on dresses that can be worn to work would have made my life much easier this summer, for example) so that I can make some slightly more practical choices while not spending on all these things now fully knowing I will absolutely get sucked into some fun but unnecessary fall trends regardless of what my budget tells me is responsible.
omg loved the traditional Chinese medicine callout, I’m a big fan of Lily choi natural healing on IG! also lol @ the field jacket craze. It’s funny bc these same things are baseline popular every year.
Am I so guilty of allowing the internet to dictate when I shop for what? Uh, yes. I am most struck by the idea of the need to be in Earth Season right now and sit with the discomfort I’m feeling in life currently.
But, also, I’m reminded to go through my summer wishlist and see what I still want (frankly probably not as much) and see what I can snipper off Posh 😂
Shopping in reverse is so so smart. It’s like tackling finances - being in control and making good financial decisions is the heart of a truly smart working wardrobe. Loved our conversation, as ever! ♥️
true definitely helps with impulse purchases. and your styling always helps me ! the best
Loved your quote and the concept.
Ah, the great mystery of sleeveless turtlenecks. They always look ultra-chic on TV shows and feel ultra-stupid 99% of the time IRL.
youre not kidding, i cant crack the code...gave mine to a friend after writing this haha.
the only time they work is in that one part of the conference hall that isn’t freezing cold or so hot you’re sweating….for those 5 minutes you will look so chic
As a sweaty person, I've actually found the perfect use for them—Zoom meetings. The higher neck looks good on camera, but my arm pits are free so I don't get too hot. I have four from Gap in different bright colors that I wear and they're my trademark outfit now. I wear them with leisure bottoms, usually (see: sweaty). But yes, rarely wear them out of the house!
Ok not to brag but I have figured this out! Either like a Dickey underneath another sweater/shirt OR worn with a cardigan, shirt jacket, or a light jacket that you plan to keep on. I like having in my office wardrobe for transitional seasons bc I never know if I’ll be freezing or roasting each day.
oooh such a good idea!
“Shopping for the future is tempting because it feels like you’re investing in a version of life you can control.” BRILLIANT!!! Great piece - thanks.
<3 thx for reading
And I absolutely did that last week (shopped for fall to gain some control) but I can feel good that half the items I bought were staples on sale and summer pieces, so perhaps I did both?! I also got pieces that last fall I wished id had. Now I just have to do a purge to make room. 😬
Hilariously I DO own a sleeveless turtleneck cashmere sweater which was a bargain from Bicester Village outlet store about 25 years ago which does indeed have its moment about once a year (actually, about once every three, but it's N Peal and it's not leaving).
I have been shopping in reverse and it's fantastic. Last year all my stars aligned so thanks to a financial windfall and shifting some temporary weight, as well as some permanent weight, yay!, and tailoring coming back into fashion, AND turning 50, I have been seriously overhauling my wardrobe and thinking really hard about the gaps, what truly suits me, what I really NEED.
For the first time in years I haven't had to panic-buy something I dislike because I didn't have time or money to find anything better. I've been watching style advice and making copious notes every time I try an outfit on and don't like it. I've worked out the big-ticket items where I'm prepared to spend a lot, but it has to tick all the boxes. For example, I really want my perfect Max Mara camel coat, but for the last couple of seasons they've all been unlined. Seriously? That much money and it's going to stick to my clothes like effing Velcro? Or I can take it to a tailor and spend even more getting it lined? I'll wait. As my grandmother used to say, if I die, I die.
I get so much satisfaction from spotting something online or in a shop, checking my list - yep, deep v neck jumper, black, cream or mid grey, merino, long in torso (thanks, Uniqlo) - trying it on and knowing I will wear it, and remembering the pieces I already own which have been waiting for it to turn up. Equally satisfying is going yes, it's good, but it's too sheer ... where's the perfect underpinning for this? Nope ... nope ..no..ugh no ...yesssss, gotcha! I'm not over consuming and I'm not buying things I pull out for the second time and think, God, I never want to wear you again, and I'm not just buying dull basics, but everything needs to earn its place in my wardrobe.
I realise that this is exactly what my mother did when I was small, for both her and me; the oft repeated mantra 'what will it go with, where will you wear it, when will you wear it, will it still fit in a year, will it wear out?' and the taking of notes for the sales. Satisfyingly circular!
i LOVE what you have: perspective ,a birds eye view of your closet! this knowledge is so cool and inspiring.
I live in the Central Valley of California and it’s early November before I can reliably count on weather that feels like fall. I like to go thrifting in January after everyone has donated their old sweaters to make room for the ones they got for Christmas.
yes! once everyone is fatigued from the non stop xmas shopping you can jump in for the good stuff
no joke, i just this year realized that January is the thrifting jackpot, so much good stuff. And I hate winter so now I have a new thing to look forward to!
Adored everything about this, the sentiment and the writing. “Do you dabble in the dark arts of sleeveless cashmere turtlenecks?” had me cackling. 👏
thank you, Bec! im glad im not the only one who feels this way haha
I am SO sorry you Rudy Giuliani-ed. I stand with you
this comment has undone all the damage and I am now fully healed. thank you for seeing me.
I love this. I am riding high on post convention FREEDOM vibes, and I love the idea of refusal as freedom. Including refusal to participate in fashion’s dictated seasons if I don’t want to!
yes more freedom plz!!
I’m pregnant which has forced me to totally pause on shopping. I usually shop in reverse but who knows what my body will look like 10 months from now? I’m really appreciating the forced pause - I’ve spent so much less money when I already thought I’d cut back on buying clothes.
yes, the future is totally unknown during such an exciting period! glad to hear you’re really embracing the pause :)
I touched on this today too! Ever since I became a mom, I’ve put a prime value on staying present and in the moment. There’s something inspiring about kids and their ability to ground you like that. That - and the fact that our late summer here in SoCal doesn’t even happen til Halloween 🤣🫠
i love that - children are so inspiring that way. <3
"Shopping for the future is tempting because it feels like you’re investing in a version of life you can control. You imagine those perfect fall moments—cozy in a new sweater, strolling through leaves in fresh boots—and you shop for that vision. It’s like shaping a future that feels more certain. But the reality doesn’t always match the picture you had in mind when you bought that outfit. You’re buying for a fantasy, not the life that actually unfolds."
OOF. This really hit me because lately whenever I see something I “like” I need to ask myself if I’m practically going to be able to fit it into my existing life and lifestyle. Many times the answer is no, and that’s how I am shielding myself from marketing and influence. It’s really hard but reality is starting to lead me vs the idea of my future self. This comes from the hard work of self-awareness and knowing what is realistically feasible for you.
Self-help folks will tell you to start living the life that you want, and then eventually it will become your life, but I don’t think that that’s realistic for most people. Essentially they are simply marketers for their own brands. We fall for this marketing, similarly how we fall for "Fall fashion" marketing. Our lives are complicated and disruptive and messy and, a lot of times, out of our control—like am I really going to be a sleeveless turtleneck girl in a few months? Or ever? Or do I just WISH I was or could be sleeveless turtleneck girl? Marketing has us as ourselves these questions all the time. But you have to take a good, hard look at your closet and what still has the tags on, factory folds still visible, soles unworn, toe boxes unscuffed... and see who you actually are.
you make such a good point about the self help dynamic..i havent really thought of it like that. and yes i learned the turtleneck lesson many times..the hard way haha. even with hobbies, like surfing! so badly wanted to be the girl who surfs...sucked and it and hated it.
such good perspective, jaime! thanks for sharing
Haha I desperately want to be into long nails but sadly I’m a short nail gal for life 🤷♀️
Everyone has their things they will inevitably admire from afar.
At the same time, there is nothing better than the freedom of letting go of the fantasy to be a surfer or having long nails. Appreciate other surfers and other people's long nails. It's so liberating to give up on a dream that isn't working for you.
oof, "But you have to take a good, hard look at your closet and what still has the tags on, factory folds still visible, soles unworn, toe boxes unscuffed... and see who you actually are."... this hit.
I’ve started leaving notes for next year in my google calendar at the end of the season as reminders for what I actually felt was missing from my wardrobe (simple but interesting enough throw on dresses that can be worn to work would have made my life much easier this summer, for example) so that I can make some slightly more practical choices while not spending on all these things now fully knowing I will absolutely get sucked into some fun but unnecessary fall trends regardless of what my budget tells me is responsible.
okay that is so smart! what a good tip, ty for sharing it!
omg loved the traditional Chinese medicine callout, I’m a big fan of Lily choi natural healing on IG! also lol @ the field jacket craze. It’s funny bc these same things are baseline popular every year.
didnt know lily choi but just scrolled through IG and i love it! ty for letting me know about her!
im pretty perplexed by the craze. love to fully check out whenever possible hahaha
It is 106 here in Texas. Fall is at least two months away, if we are lucky
hahaha god speed
I am so with you on all of this. Great read!! Also, so glad I scored my field jacket a couple of years ago from a vintage shop for the low low 🤪
there are so many good vintage ones very inexpensive...glad you scored :)
Am I so guilty of allowing the internet to dictate when I shop for what? Uh, yes. I am most struck by the idea of the need to be in Earth Season right now and sit with the discomfort I’m feeling in life currently.
But, also, I’m reminded to go through my summer wishlist and see what I still want (frankly probably not as much) and see what I can snipper off Posh 😂
guilty of it, too. but i love the idea that the only way forward is through. no tricky time travel
and yes enjoy your sniping and try not to piss too many people off with your offer (like i did recently 😂)